Honestly, it’s been rough…

I need to be open with you guys. I first started my blog years ago as a platform for me to freely express my thoughts. I vowed that I’d be real with myself and anyone who reads my blog. So here goes…

Life has been very hard.

I left a stable and secure position in Marketing & Social Media at a Las Vegas casino to pursue a “dream” I had since college. Becoming a realtor was the last “what if” on my list of dream careers and it seems like it was also the worst decision I’ve ever made in my life. Leaving my previous position has been devastating to my finances and mental health.

I no longer glow. I’m no longer happy. I rarely smile and laugh. All I know is stress and worry and anxiety, which is so ironic because I left my comfortable and fun job in hopes of bettering myself. But it was a risk I was wholeheartedly not ready to take, yet I did.

I learned so many lessons these past months. I left in February. It’s now August. I’ve still yet to secure another full time position. All I want is to feel secure and independent and happy again. I know everyone will chime in every now and then and tell me to keep my head up—stay strong. But it is so hard.

I’m not just being melodramatic here. I’ve seriously hit the lowest point in my life thus far, in terms of my career, my finances, and my happiness. I may look differently on social media. If you follow me on Instagram, it may seem like not much has changed and that I’m living my best life. But the reality is that I’m not. I’m only trying to keep it together.

I’m trying my best to redeem myself, and to get back everything that I lost but I’ve missed so many opportunities. And I’ve been rejected from quite a few…. I’m trying to stay grateful and look past it all—to know that I’ll get over this. But it’s a process. I’ve put myself back years… I regressed.

Getting through all of this is my next and most important short-term goal. Simply surviving these past six months, I’ve learned a lot about myself, my limits, and who I really am as a person. It’s tested me so many times. The sleepless nights, the stress, the anxiety. Life is just hard.

I’m so sorry if my life update isn’t what you expected. But I have to stay real and be candid with you all. If you’re going through something, know that you’re not alone. Everyone goes through their own shit and we still manage to post our best lives on social media. So be kind to everyone regardless of what’s going on with you because you never know what they’re going through.

I love you all. Good night.

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